The first connection every human has is with his or her mother. It starts in the womb and, as soon as the newborn child is in his or her mother's arms, and especially on her breasts, that connection or bonding is reinforced. Unfortunately, the child who doesn't have healthy bonding in those early years is being programmed for life-long problems unless he or she goes through recovery. If the infant child feels no bonding at all, he or she can die. Connection and bonding is essential for our entire lifetime. We cannot live without it. As counselors tell us, "We cannot not be bonded!" And, if we are not bonded in healthy ways, we will be bonded in unhealthy ways. For example, some people stay in very unhealthy and toxic relationships for fear of being isolated and not connected to someone. Others may be bonded to their work, gambling, drugs, alcohol, sex, or material possessions and so on. Healthy bonding needs to be a priority of every individual and should be available in every church. If you can't find it there, find it with some open, non-judgmental healthy friends, or in a recovery or twelve-step group. Healthy bonding to healthy people is essential for healthy, wholesome, and meaningful living - emotionally, physically, relation-ally, and spiritually. And it is critical for meaningful and fulfilling family life.

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